Chicks, dicks n tits

E’yday beautiful ladies and a pant load of average chicks are spending all this dough on self mutilation, the majority is visibly on fake tits. Soooo many of my girlfriends that don’t have 'em want 'em. (my girls with 'em, I'm not hating, do ur thang)

Honestly, what is the point of fake tits? To pick up guys? to look better in tops? Increase your sex appeal? PULEASE it’s not like it actually makes your sex life that much better. I don’t get why more guys aren’t enhancing their bodies. As far as I’m concerned for all the chicks with fake tits there should be guys with fake dicks. It rhymes for a reason, no such thing as a coincidence.

Seriously! More guys should get a penis enlargement. I know this procedure exists. C’mon admit it, you wish your dick was bigger! even if it’s your boyfriends. Even guys with big shlongs wouldn’t mind an extra inch. And trust me unless it hurts you could add a lil girth or lil length. (on a side note, I’m glad my dad isn’t reading this). Just ONE inch can make all the difference. There is nothing worse then meeting a guy who is nice, charming, good looking, funny, successful, opens the fucking door !!! All is going well,you’re HOT you’re WET and then.....

“WHAM-O”…..small fucking penis.
SAY WHAAAA?!?!? I’m not trying to be mean but, maybe that’s the reason why he is SOO nice,and so perfect. Its BECAUSE he has a small dick and usually guys with big dicks are just that ….BIG DICKS! Not to mention they’re usually fat sluts because,

“Shit girl, look at all this! You’re telling me you don’t like it, real fat and real long?? Bitch please”

And of course you do, cuz unless it hurts… That’s whats up! This is the true reason why girls like bad boys that treat them like dirt and the ladies come back for more. Mystery solved.

That’s the bone I have to pick on unnecessary augmentation. I’m sure you may be thinking
“I don’t need a bigger dick, these girls need a tighter pussy, she should get surgery to MAKE it tighter!”
Last time I checked there’s an exercise for that… there’s no exercise to make your dick bigger. (ooooh wouldn't that be nice). In a perfect world, every guy with a modest porn collection would be packing HEAT! Fuck, you would be encouraged to rub one out! Nice right? Well too bad, go get a Swedish penis enlarger.

P.S. Sadly, I don’t think they exist